17 July 1926 - 25 February 2008
In her circle of life Helen Brodie has , in some way, touched and impacted on each one of our lives – which is why we are all here today. And can I say that some of her friendships have extended over more than 60 years, such as that with Ina Ralton. Helen would probably have accused us all of making far to much of a fuss over her by coming here today – but it was always necessary to interpret carefully what Helen was saying – because what she probably meant was something like “hey, we're all here now, let's get on with the party” - she was often the life and soul of any party. As someone who was grafted into the family through marriage, it's been my privilege to have known Helen Brodie for almost 37 years. Helen and I had a mutual liking for a certain type of drink – not one of your fancy wines or rare whiskys – but for a good cup of tea. Each time we visited Helen, a conversation took place which went something like this - “You'll have a cup of tea Robert” - to which Mari, Helen's niece and my better half, would answer, “No, we're fine Auntie. Don't go to any trouble.” Auntie's response was always along the lines of “Who asked you? Robert can speak for himself. He wants a cup of tea whether you do or not.” And so the kettle went on, and I enjoyed a lovely cup of tea – without having to speak one word!
Actually, I never really knew Helen AS Helen - but as Auntie Nell – and that was something which frequently got me into trouble – I have no idea how many times she scolded me and told it should be Aunt Helen. And that is something which caused me problems when it came to researching family history, because nowhere in the records could I find the birth of either a Helen Gray or Nell Gray. What I did eventually find – and I was daured ever to tell anyone this discovery - was that her birth had been registered as Nellie. Nellie Crum Gray was born in the district of New Cumnock on 17th July 1926. She arrived in this world to find she already had a big brother Alan, a big sister Marion and about 7 years later that trio was joined by little brother Hugh.
The family grew up living in the country. Going to school meant a walk from their home in the Mansefield into New Cumnock – in the summer they would take off their shoes and walk barefooted on the warm tarmac of the roads – and all they needed to do to wash their feet was to nip down and have a paddle in the Afton. Their playmates included people such as Campbell Hunter – the father of Sir Tom Hunter. Helen had a pal, Betty Glover, from Auchinleck. The two of them once wanted to go together to stay with their maiden aunt in Rothesay – their parents gave them permission to make the trip but mum put one condition – that they had to take wee brother Hugh with them! A good move by mum I guess, but an interesting take on a world that has somewhat changed since those days.
This was the generation which lived through and served in World War 2 and were conscripted into some sort of service which aided the military effort. Helen wore the uniform of the ATS, in 1949 being granted special leave to return from her base at Arbourfield to be bridesmaid at her sisters wedding. After wartime service, both sisters worked in Heathfield Hospital.
Helen went on to Domestic Service. The family of the house in which she worked had a famous friend who sometimes visited – he was Joe Loss the Dance Band Leader. I wonder if that had any significance for Helen's future love of dancing?
Helen went on to be a cook at Wellington School in Ayr, but she eventually met, and subsequently married widower John – or Jock - Brodie and the couple settled in Auchinleck where Jock already lived. Although Helen was a New Cumnock girl, in a sense this was her returning to the location of some of her family roots.
In the kirkyard here in Auchinleck where there is a headstone with the name of members of the Tait family. On that stone is the name of one of Helen's Great Grandfathers – John Tait – along with that of her Great Grandmother, Helen Crombie. Which just goes to show that she was quite correct in maintaining that we should be calling her Helen, regardless of what her Birth Certificate said !!.
Helen and Jock's marriage saw the birth of two sons, Billy and John - but then, in 1967, tragedy struck the family when Jock sustained severe injuries in a pit accident, resulting in his death in hospital a matter of hours later. This was a tragedy which affected not just Helen and her boys, but also Jock's family from his first marriage – Eileen, Sandy and Jim, who, following the death of their mother, had been brought up by their grandparents. Since I came into the family, I have been fully aware of Eileen and her family as part of Helen's family circle.
Following on from Jock's death, Helen returned to work as a cook, this time at Auchinleck Academy where she saw our her working life and moved into retirement – but certainly not into decline. What became evident was a Gray family trait – that of perpetual motion. Alan always seemed to be building things – Marion can be found in any location that a bus pass will take her – Hugh seems to maintain all the fancy gardens in Ayrshire, except for his own, of course! As for Helen – well, in the two decades since Helen retired from work, if we wanted to see Helen we needed to make an appointment. And this state of perpetual motion can also be seen in Helen's niece and namesake as well as in my elder son.
Helen – along with daughter-in-law Loretta - could frequently be seen saddling up her horse, popping on her Stetson-and-spurs and heading up the road to the Line Dancing in Auchinleck ! Of course there was always the posher side to Helen when she went to Ayr to take part in dancing of a more ballroom style, such as waltzes, although I suspect she may have also sneaked in the occasional Gay Gordons and the likes. Dancing was an area where I had to carefully interpret what Helen was saying to me at family celebrations. For, when Helen asked me “Are you not dancing Robert?” - I knew fine well that what she really meant was “Hey Robert, put that stupid camera down and get on the dance floor.” I also knew that I'd better do as I was told!
Helen also loved to play Bingo. Now, I'm not sure what I can say about Bingo – other than mention what I believe are two of Helen's Bingo addicts – The Two Chrissies. If you can see two wee wummin wearing headscarfs in the congregation today, then that's probably The Two Chrissies. Helen used to joke that if either of the two Chrissies passed away she wouldn't bother sending flowers, she'd send a headscarf instead.
Helen also participated in many bus trips, visiting a wide range of locations – many, I suspect, with good cups of tea and Bingo!!
One destination that Helen really liked was a place where her son John was based for a while – and that was Blackpool. I suppose Blackpool is a bit like Ayr-with-fairylights – and it certainly has plenty of places to play Bingo, drink cups of tea, and dance. I have this picture in my mind of Helen gliding across the ballroom floor to the sound of Reginald Dixon playing the mighty Wurlitzer Organ. Helen's dance partner is a pencil and Bingo card, and – while Reggie brings the music to a crescendo – there' a great cheer as NELL shouts “HOUSE” ! Oops, I've just used the N word – that's me in trouble yet again !
Helen also loved having her family around her during her retirement – and that included her grandchildren, Kim, Jason and Keri. Helen gave her family her love and the family responded to her with love – and that was no more evident than in the past weeks when her health declined.
Helen has now completed her circle of life and each one of us here has had our lives enriched by having known her.
Helen may have been born a Gray – but she brought colour into all our lives. So, before I dance my way back to my seat, I would like to ask all of you to show your appreciation for the life of Helen Brodie by putting your hands together and saying thank you through a standing ovation.
PICS